'Twas not the way I heard it told, by those
Who knew him well, so if you have the time
To sit a spell, and listen to this rhyme
I will, for you, the tawdry facts disclose.

It was a dark and blustery night, the sort
That England's wont to have quite regularly,
And he and good ole Jack did quickly see
A haven from the storm, and put to port.

For them the finer things in life, were stout,
And Old Peculier, bitters, Magnet Ale,
And don't forget, once more to tell the tale
Of bears, and bells, and pepper spray, no doubt.

And in their jolly camaraderie
Not noticing how quick the night does pass,
To their surprise, they're thrown out on their ass,
And now must look for somewhere else to pee.

Staggering home, quite confident was he
That beer had lent an added facet to
His charm and wit, and so his thoughts to woo
Were urgent on his mind, (you'll likely see).

Two at a time, he took them at a run,
(The stairs I mean), and on his mattress jumps,
Caressing all the lumps and bumps,
And in his stupor thought he'd have some fun.

And in the morning, (getting to the point
Of all this drivel), he awoke to find
No mistress, only that they'd left behind
The old mattress. His nose quite out of joint

He sprung from bed, and tripping on the cat
Flew through the air, and with an awkward twist,
Fell to the floor, and broke his flipping wrist,
And that's the truth, now waddya think of that?

In case you're wondering about Jack, he went out west looking for bears.

JP, So, the truth comes out at last. jhs

Ah....ha. Well! That's a very um, a very interesting piece! Rhythm a little hard to find, but.....lol. I liked it, in a weird...twisted way. Thanks much!

Lady of the Night

Hi Lady, Great to hear from you. What's this with parents? Only being allowed on once a week. First Siren, now you. You need to read Stephen's poem first 'The man who mistook his mistress for a mattress' His is so much better than mine, but I just couldn't resist. JP

JP--a twisted tale indeed..enjoyed muchly. A week or so ago I was on the computer so long and was bleary eyed----time for dinner and my hubby brought it to me with a refreshment so I wouldn't have to quit. The parents want their kids off the computer so they can get on. Ell :p

Sad news. A broken wrist, seemed to be healing, and then ...


The sound of her silk skirt has stopped.
On the marble pavement dust
grows.
Her empty room is cold and still.
Fallen leaves are piled against
the doors.

Longing for that lovely lady,
how can I bring my aching heart to rest?
-- Han Wu-Ti 187-157 B.C., on the death of his mistress

Stephen

Aw! But, hark! What noise through yonder window sounds?
It is the wife, and I was thusly wrong
To think her dead, as I myself may be
When she discovers that I had her key.
JP

P.S. Stephen. Thankyou for all the poems you post that I have never before heard. JP

I likes this one, too Good work (again) JP.

Lady of the Night

I never conquered, rarely came, sixteen just held such better days.

And that's the truth, now waddya think of that?

What a truth!! Well, the truth is I enjoyed this very much!Thanks JP!

I never saw this before, it's wonderfully funny!


tempest

Life don't seem fair to us, I know, But it don't help none to whine, If life was fair, your horse would get To ride you half the time. --Terry

JP-

Musta missed this one while on the bare hunt!





(Yes, it was intentional)



Jack

Jack, I've heard of Running Bear. Were you looking for White Dove?

Les

A wonderful ditty. Posted a few days afore my time on emule and whilst I was too dumb to know to hunt up JP's poetry.
Love the story.
Ever wake up and not know where your car is?

Ever wake up and not know where your car is,,,,,,,,,,,,, and be in your car?

Jack... bare hunting is dangerous in misquito country... take care.

Terry

Good Grief!
Of all the poems to drag up again.
But thankyou for the comments anyway.

JP

Here's JP's version.


Les

Edited 1 time(s). Last edit at 01/15/2013 03:51PM by les712.