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Intellectual Intercourse
Posted by: Lady of the Night (---.unet.maine.edu)
Date: June 04, 2002 08:16AM

Hello All,

There are many new faces on this phorum, and I know I've posted this in General Discussion, but I'm hoping to generate new responses!


Intellectual Intercourse

I want to engage in intellectual intercourse
To drink deeply of experience
Sip slowly from the cup of wisdom
I want to meditate on the rain slapping the windowpane
Speak quietly to one another
At three a.m. over Earl Grey Tea
I want to discuss the meaning of all that exists
To gaze at the moon that sails by
Contemplate the equations of life
I want to toy with the fingers of the soul that drives you
Taste of a passion we both possess
Share a common spirituality
I want to engage in intellectual intercourse

Punctuation Version

I want to engage in intellectual intercourse.
To drink deeply of experience;
Sip slowly from the cup of wisdom.
I want to meditate on the rain slapping the windowpane.
Speak quietly to one another
At three a.m. over Earl Grey Tea.
I want to discuss the meaning of all that exists,
To gaze at the moon that sails by;
Contemplate the equations of life.
I want to toy with the fingers of the soul that drives you,
Taste of a passion we both possess;
Share a common spirituality.
I want to engage in intellectual intercourse.


A good friend of mine (Brucefur) encouraged me to add punctuation. Personally, I think it gets in the way, but...which do you guys prefer?

Appreciations in Advance,
Lady of the Night


Re: Intellectual Intercourse
Posted by: Lychgate (---.in-addr.btopenworld.com)
Date: June 04, 2002 08:43AM

Good metaphor and good work.

I prefer the punctuation version, because to me it gives it the "completed" feeling and polished look.


Re: Intellectual Intercourse
Posted by: Lady of the Night (---.unet.maine.edu)
Date: June 04, 2002 10:21AM

Thanks for your thoughts! smiling smiley Oh, and do you have any suggestions on better punctuation? I'm not used to using it in my poetry.

Your Lady


Re: Intellectual Intercourse
Posted by: Pat (---.networkrichmond.com)
Date: June 04, 2002 03:16PM

Were you asking Lychgate in particular for help with punctuation or is this open to anyone? If you don't mind who answers, I'd like to try the punctuation . . . also try to make the phrases parallel:

I want to engage in intellectual intercourse,
Drink deeply of experience,
Sip slowly from the cup of wisdom.
I want to meditate on the rain slapping the windowpane,
Speak quietly to you
At three a.m. over Earl Grey tea.
I want to discuss the meaning of all that exists,
Gaze at the moon that sails by,
Contemplate the equations of life.
I want to toy with the fingers of the soul that drives you,
Taste of a passion we both possess,
Share a common spirituality.
I want to engage in intellectual intercourse.


Re: Intellectual Intercourse
Posted by: Lady of the Night (---.unet.maine.edu)
Date: June 04, 2002 04:17PM

Thank you, Pat. Of course my request for help with punctuation is open to anyone smiling smiley I'll take all suggestions into consideration, and I appreciate all responses. Thank you again for your revision.

Also, there has been some debate about the line "I want to toy with the fingers of the soul that drives you." Should it be "drive" or "drives"?? After all, it is the soul that drives. But I want to toy with the fingers of the soul......basically, I'm only confused on the technically correct grammar of the line. The message I want to convey is that it is the soul that drives, not the fingers. But, I just needed to know what to make the verb agree with. Thanks!

Lady of the Night


Re: Intellectual Intercourse
Posted by: confusing mind (---.ed.co.sanmateo.ca.us)
Date: June 05, 2002 12:55PM

my opinion shall come soon, i am working on it


Re: Intellectual Intercourse
Posted by: Lady of the Night (---.unet.maine.edu)
Date: June 05, 2002 02:32PM

Confusing Mind -

Ahh, it takes that much time?? Lol, j/k. Thanks!

- Lady of the Night


Re: Intellectual Intercourse
Posted by: Pat (---.networkrichmond.com)
Date: June 05, 2002 03:38PM

If the soul is doing the driving then "I want to toy with the fingers of the soul that drives you" is correct.


Re: Intellectual Intercourse
Posted by: Lady of the Night (---.unet.maine.edu)
Date: June 05, 2002 03:52PM

Thanks Pat smiling smiley A friend of mine said it was 'drive' but that didn't seem right, so....yeah, thank you!

- Lady of the Night


Re: Intellectual Intercourse
Posted by: Brucefur (---.vc.shawcable.net)
Date: June 05, 2002 07:35PM

I agree with Pat's punctuation version, I think that it has more flow that way.
The only thing that I would change would be:

Share a common spirituality;
followed by a line break, so that it would read thus.

Share a common spirituality;

I want to engage in Intellectual Intercourse.


PS: Friends don't let friends souls drive drunk! ;-)


Re: Intellectual Intercourse
Posted by: silent siren (---.dip0.t-ipconnect.de)
Date: June 07, 2002 09:16AM

As J.H.Summer would write: Fine poem. I'm looking forward to hear more from you.
As I would add personally: This is WONDERFUl.


Re: Intellectual Intercourse
Posted by: Lady of the Night (---.unet.maine.edu)
Date: June 07, 2002 09:39AM

Brucefur -

You're such a dork, lol.

Siren -

Thank you very much smiling smiley I really enjoy your work as well, you're a very good poet. Keep it up!

- Lady of the Night


Re: Intellectual Intercourse
Posted by: Scarification Infestation (---.sprint.ca)
Date: June 10, 2002 09:00PM

I try to avoid using punctuation, except for commas and semi-colons within phrases.

I like the poem... Pretty winking smiley Sexual intercourse isn't the same without intellectual intercourse...

~B~


Re: Intellectual Intercourse
Posted by: M (---.jetstream.xtra.co.nz)
Date: June 11, 2002 06:01AM

Punctuation can be ok if it fits the poem. I often find that punctuation disturbs the flow of a poem for my eye - it's just personal preference I guess. Poetry comes from the heart - if it came from yours with puntuation in it, leave it so. If it came without, leave it so. Just my personal opinion.
:-)

Emily, changer of stars


Re: Intellectual Intercourse
Posted by: Lady of the Night (---.unet.maine.edu)
Date: June 11, 2002 07:10AM

In MY personal opinion, I LOATHE punctuation in poetry. However, Brucefur here is trying to convert me to his blockheaded stubborn snarky Canadian ways, and get me to use punctuation. I didn't know if I was way out of times for not using it, or what, so I posted it on here for thoughts...thank you for yours!

- La Femme du Soir


Re: Intellectual Intercourse
Posted by: Brucefur (---.vc.shawcable.net)
Date: June 18, 2002 12:15PM

Hey Lady,

Hadn't heard from you in a while; are you avoiding this fine site?

I have spent a pleasant morning reading through some of the older poems on this forum; over tea of course, and I decided after some thought, to make this my showcase piece.
Reintroduce it as it were for those folks that maybe new to the board and may have missed this incredible peice of poetry.

I do have one question though, not just for you, but for JP, JHS and others as well; doesn't anyone use stanza's anymore? And why is there such a lack of them in modern poetical prose?

Come to think of it, I haven't seen Desi's witty commentary of late either; where are you all hiding?


Re: Intellectual Intercourse
Posted by: JP (207.43.74.---)
Date: June 18, 2002 12:26PM

What's in a stanza?
A poem in any other form
Still reads as sweet.


Re: Intellectual Intercourse
Posted by: J.H. SUMMERS (---.proxy.aol.com)
Date: June 18, 2002 07:12PM

Dear Lady, For me, punctuation depends on the piece. It also helps you get more into the poets intended flow of the poem. To answer Brucefur's question on stanzas, they seem to be types of punctuation. Also they add effect to the poem. When I wrote "When The Circus Comes To Town", it would have looked better with stanzas of 4 lines each. And lest I forget to mention, fine poem. jhs


Re: Intellectual Intercourse
Posted by: lgreen (---.client.attbi.com)
Date: June 20, 2002 02:28AM

Lady: I like punctuation---helps to follow the flow---however---the lovely poem is still lovely--dressed or undressed...lgreen


Re: Intellectual Intercourse
Posted by: Nolon (64.91.31.---)
Date: June 20, 2002 05:18AM

I really liked the poem ladyofthenight i have read all comments and every one seemed nice punctuation to me well i dont use it cause i seriously have the slightest clue where it goes but i do say write the poem as you wish punctuation or none yes but the whole intellectual intercourse i never thought of it that way but yes its truth and it was a short and nice poem

"To write something, you have to risk making a fool of yourself." Anne Rice


Re: Intellectual Intercourse
Posted by: Brucefur (---.bc.hsia.telus.net)
Date: June 28, 2002 04:37PM

Okay lady, forgive me for this, but I went to a coffee club last night that consisted solely of female vocalists and some womens poetry; some of them had best keep their day jobs though. Still I did find something inspirational in all of them, and one of the things that I found myself thinking of during the one performance was how well this piece would convert to song lyrics. Now I am sure that Jeremy would have a better Idea as to how that should be, but here is my attempt at it.

I want to engage
in intellectual intercourse,
Drink deeply of experience,
Sip slowly
slowly, from the cup of wisdom.

I want to meditate
on the rain
slapping on the windowpane,
I want to
Speak quietly to you
At three a.m.
over Earl Grey tea.

I want to discuss
the meaning of all that exists,
Gaze at the moon
that sails on by,
Contemplate
the equations of life.

I want to toy with
the fingers
of the soul
that drives you, drives you,
Taste of a passion we both possess,
Share
a common spirituality.

meditating
on the rain
slapping on the windowpane,
Speaking quietly to you
At three a.m.
over Earl Grey tea.

I want to,
I want to,
I want to engage in
intellectual intercourse.

meditating
on the rain
slapping on the windowpane,
Speaking quietly to you.
it's past three a.m.
We are engaged in Intellectual Intercourse.

(Any suggestions on the style of music it should be set to? Myself I was thinking Sarah McLachlan)


Re: Intellectual Intercourse
Posted by: lgreen (---.client.attbi.com)
Date: June 28, 2002 10:11PM

Brucefur: I think you are on to something--and Sarah McLachlan seems to fit!! I love this poem anyway and I too agree that it should be sung...
That's my 2 cents....lgreen winking smiley


Re: Intellectual Intercourse
Posted by: silent siren (---.ber.dial.de.colt.net)
Date: June 30, 2002 02:32AM

This is difficult.
Evidently, the first version ever posted has verses breaking exactly where a thought ends, Bruce's song version reminds me strongly of the perhaps too intellectual German poetry style breaking the thoughts in the middle of the line moulding it into another rhyming shape that's interesting to put together again.
On the other hand, you say it should be sung, and in this way it corresponds with song texts indeed.
Can we say the first is the original poem and Bruce's version is the first step to the composition?

silent siren


Re: Intellectual Intercourse
Posted by: Lady of the Night (---.megalink.net)
Date: June 30, 2002 07:37PM

Just a quick reply to y'all

No time! Brucefur, when I get a moment I will read your suggestions more in depth, but you may have something! And I love Sarah McLachlan, so.... grins Lol. I gots to go now!! Write soon. Luvs!

- Lady of the Night


Re: Intellectual Intercourse
Posted by: Brucefur (---.bc.hsia.telus.net)
Date: July 01, 2002 03:46PM

So then Siren,

Would you instead make it an aria? ;-)

Myself I would be VERY interested in hearing the results.

I think that it is marvelous that you are training to be an opera singer, and although myself I have never liked opera much, I do have to admit that nothing makes a movie climax better than a good opera piece.

oops; did I use the work climax here; Sorry, must remain more intellectual in my correspondence. ;-)

Brucefur

PS: I have very many connections in the Folk festival circuit here in Vancouver...now I do know that isn't opera, but then much of what they promote isn't folk either. Does Siren have any music online?

PPS: If any of you are going to be attending this years Silver anniversary of the Vancouver Folk Music Festival, let me know and perhaps we can get together.


Re: Intellectual Intercourse
Posted by: Lady of the Night (---.megalink.net)
Date: July 02, 2002 12:18AM

BRUCE!

My God man, go home!! Get out of the sun and away from those "scantily clad" ladies!! By God you're scaring me! You're becoming drunk off of the sunlight and the heat!

- Lady of the Night

PS: Dude, you're my FATHER (kind of)! Don't EVER use "climax" in my presence again!!


Re: Intellectual Intercourse
Posted by: Brucefur (---.bc.hsia.telus.net)
Date: July 02, 2002 11:08PM

lol there Lady,

Very well, I promise to get out of the sun and back to my healthier vampyric ways; I am back to Graveyard for the next month. Yay!

Hmmm my friend here is playing some gospel music...I always loved that stuff.

I have been meaning to write you dear, but I seem to be so busy.
My friend here, her father is a poet and such a fascinating old duffer that I seem to have lost entire days in conversation with him. Not to mention that her house has turned into philosophy central.
So if my thoughts seem scattered, well that is why.
Best wishes to you all;
Love,
Brucefur


Re: Intellectual Intercourse
Posted by: silent siren (---.ber.dial.de.colt.net)
Date: July 07, 2002 04:40AM

Hi Count B.,

had to laugh about composition remarks. But, serious, I believe it is possible...but difficult! And I've got eleven other pieces and a children's opera in the long distance that wait!
Have you seen the 5th element and the "Il dolce suono" (Lucia di Lammermoor, Donizetti) remix? Ain't it awsome?
I'll be in Seattle in February but busy with music. ;-)
And I don't have music online, I'm really not famous and my recordings border to the non existant. How could I manage, do you know?

silent siren


Re: Intellectual Intercourse
Posted by: Stephen Fryer (---.cache.pol.co.uk)
Date: July 07, 2002 09:55AM

To get back to the poem ...

Pat's version builds expertly on Nutmeg's brilliant base, and is the best resolution of the idea. The punctuation is essential for a wider audience. If, and only if, you can stand the heat dear Lady, how about posting on Eratosphere? Publishers read that site, y'know. You might get more criticism but you might get more exposure.

Stephen


Re: Intellectual Intercourse
Posted by: Stephen Fryer (---.cache.pol.co.uk)
Date: July 07, 2002 09:56AM

To get back to the poem ...

Pat's version builds expertly on Nutmeg's brilliant base, and is the best resolution of the idea. The punctuation is essential for a wider audience. If, and only if, you can stand the heat dear Lady, how about posting on Eratosphere? Publishers read that site, y'know. You might get more criticism but you might get more exposure.

Stephen


Re: Intellectual Intercourse
Posted by: Lady of the Night (66.231.192.---)
Date: July 07, 2002 01:54PM

I'd love to post on Eratosphere! What's their site?

Still hesitating about punctuation though.. tongue sticking out smiley

As for you, Bruce...you make your vampire state sound so depressing! Seriously, you've opened up more, you're much freer now that you got away from PG. You seem much happier, and I'm happy for you smiling smiley

Thanks all,
- Lady of the Night


Re: Intellectual Intercourse
Posted by: Stephen Fryer (---.cache.pol.co.uk)
Date: July 07, 2002 02:35PM


Re: Intellectual Intercourse
Posted by: silent siren (---.ber.dial.de.colt.net)
Date: July 07, 2002 04:08PM

hmmm. I'll try that site next sunday.
siren


Re: Intellectual Intercourse
Posted by: Lady of the Night (---.unet.maine.edu)
Date: July 19, 2002 11:37AM

Stephen -

Which forum do you suggest I post on? I'd like the publishers to read and comment or whatever as well. Thanks for your thoughts.

Megan


Re: Intellectual Intercourse
Posted by: Stephen Fryer (---.cache.pol.co.uk)
Date: July 19, 2002 01:26PM

Answered by email.

Stephen


Re: Intellectual Intercourse
Posted by: Jack (---.southg01.mi.comcast.net)
Date: February 14, 2003 01:01PM

bump


Re: Intellectual Intercourse
Posted by: Jack (---.southg01.mi.comcast.net)
Date: February 15, 2003 04:47PM

bump bump


Re: Intellectual Intercourse
Posted by: Salma Kamran (---.houston.rr.com)
Date: February 15, 2003 06:50PM

I want to engage in intellectual intercourse
Sip from the cup of youth's immaturity
Gain wisdom from age of enlightenment
As I sit there four o' clock in the morning
I pour myself another glass of wine
while you light another cigarette.

Salma.


Re: Intellectual Intercourse
Posted by: silent siren (---.ber.dial.de.colt.net)
Date: February 15, 2003 10:31PM

Ha! Just wondered who reposted that!

silent siren
sneaks in again


Re: Intellectual Intercourse
Posted by: Lady of the Night (66.231.193.---)
Date: February 15, 2003 11:54PM

Cool cool Salma. Not quite me, but I like it. I'd say more but I'm in a weird mood....

Lady of the Night


Re: Intellectual Intercourse
Posted by: Richard Brunton (---.vip.uk.com)
Date: February 17, 2003 11:12AM

I agree with M in that punctuation fits where the author places it, otherwise it doesn't. You're the author.

The other thought I had was that punction immediately imposes a structure on the poem, which can be good, but without it the poem can be open to so much more interpretation from the reader. I think this can be a good thing, in that they may read it the way they wish to, giving it more chance of finding common emotions within them and stirring something.

That said, if there is a specific emotion or purpose, then I would think that a rigid structure may direct the reader to that much easier.


Re: Intellectual Intercourse
Posted by: Lady of the Night (64.70.24.---)
Date: February 18, 2003 09:22AM

Well said, Richard. I haven't the time to properly respond, but I'll be back within the next couple of days. Thank you so much for your time!

Lady of the Night


Re: Intellectual Intercourse
Posted by: Brucefur (---.ca.shawcable.net)
Date: February 23, 2003 12:01AM

Well, well, well, looky what I found! And Siren here as well? What happened Siren, your bath get too cold too?

I was trying to find Salma's poem so that I could keep an old promise, and found this one under her comments and couldn't resist taking a peak at an old favourite of mine, no matter the version.
So Jack, thank you so much for the bumps. You are truly a godsend.

Megan, how about making those lyrics out of this, and posting it on Siren's board at Cosmic?

So great to see you all again, even in transit.


Re: Intellectual Intercourse
Posted by: J.H. SUMMERS (---.proxy.aol.com)
Date: February 23, 2003 12:29AM

Dear Lady, Nice to see this one surface again, it remains a great read and still ranks among your best. jhs


Re: Intellectual Intercourse
Posted by: Lady of the Night (64.70.24.---)
Date: February 24, 2003 04:39PM

Thank you so much, J.H. And Bruce, I never could write lyrics; I'm too much a fan of other songs/artists, and they always creep their way into lyrics that I write.

Glad to see you guys still like this! Bump (for newbies).

Lady of the Night


Re: Intellectual Intercourse
Posted by: Percival (---.c189.t7.mrt.starband.net)
Date: February 25, 2003 01:16AM

I have to offer the using of a soul.
Breaking you, remaking you, taking your soul.
I take your pain and it eats mine a thousand times larger,
Stronger.
My darkness lite by your flicker of a flame that would never reach a blaze
To burn freeze.
I offer human weakness on a platter and trick an Angel into being my Demon.
Strong as me though he can't see & I
Just around to use him.
But I lie completely, just the Demonic Poet in me
I heal pains never scaved by human eyes and without a single try,
I read your eyes.
Everytime your movements give me lie
Everytime I see a weakness to make you cry.
I destroy you,
And pick you up.

Demonic Poet,
Angelic Healer,
Hunter Vision,
Prey's sight,
Affraid of what I'm about to do tonight.

And I burn poetry

But the heat burns only me though
The pages weighed down with ink burned so
Still the ink is in my blood's flow
And I hope you know my blood was bleach.
Before the breach of love you gave me,
My blood as bleach would flow all threw me.
But now
I just bleed and bleed


~Percival


Re: Intellectual Intercourse
Posted by: marasmus (---.ypeast01.mi.comcast.net)
Date: February 27, 2003 11:47PM

I like the idea of adding my own punctuation. its really a subjective preference of the reader and their choice reflects their style.


Re: Intellectual Intercourse
Posted by: Percival (---.c189.t7.mrt.starband.net)
Date: March 02, 2003 10:03PM

And when intellectual tures sextual my body earns a metal for mental
Savagry ripping from you the very passion which you tried to use on me
~


Re: Intellectual Intercourse
Posted by: Holding Mercury (---.proxy.aol.com)
Date: March 02, 2003 10:58PM

Lady, I havn't been here in awhile and I just read this piece and through the whole thing all I could think of was the next part. This was truley beautifully written, yet I personally prefer the non-puncuated version. I pictured the line of rain slapping the windowpane so well. For it seems such days come and all you want is to sit down and just read a fantasy to take you as far away as you can possibly get. Very well liked.

-Oxide Slain


Re: Intellectual Intercourse
Posted by: Lady of the Night (---.unet.maine.edu)
Date: March 03, 2003 08:09AM

Thanks guys smiling smiley I'll say more later. Bye!

Lady of the Night


Re: Intellectual Intercourse
Posted by: xiimix (---.tybout01.de.comcast.net)
Date: March 04, 2003 10:02AM

i like this alot, and its good you put punctuation in, because i usually dont


Re: Intellectual Intercourse
Posted by: Lady of the Night (66.231.193.---)
Date: March 04, 2003 02:50PM

Thank you, xiimix smiling smiley Do you have any suggestions on how I could change it?

Lady of the Night


Re: Intellectual Intercourse
Posted by: Lady of the Night (66.231.192.---)
Date: May 02, 2003 05:48PM

Jay,

I'd like your thoughts on this one.

Lady of the Night


Re: Intellectual Intercourse
Posted by: Jay M (---.yorkton.com)
Date: May 05, 2003 02:09PM

I remember this one. It's been a while since I last wrote a crit, but i'll give it a shot. First off, I like the punc version. Having said that, I wonder about your use of the semi-colon. It seems to me that a comma would be more appropriate, but as you know, punc is not my strength. In addition, you don't have to capitalize every line. Only capitalize after a period. I have revised your poem below, with commas in place of semi-colons.
My usual, line-by-line comments are included also.


I want to engage in intellectual intercourse;
to drink deeply of experience,
sip slowly from the cup of wisdom.

L3 is a tad cliched. Just a tad, though.

I want to meditate on the rain slapping the windowpane;
speak quietly to one another,
at three a.m. over Earl Grey Tea.

In L1 you speak of meditation, which is usually done in silence. Then, in L2 you mention speaking to one another. These two ideas conflict with each other, unless the speaking comes after the meditation is completed. If this is the case, you need to clarify that within your poem.

I want to discuss the meaning of all that exists;
to gaze at the moon that sails by,
contemplate the equations of life.

Re: L2...while the image of a moon sailing by is lovely, it is something I have never witnessed, and I suspect the same can be said for most of your readers. Therefore, i'm not sure about the effectiveness of the line.

I want to toy with the fingers of the soul that drives you;
taste a passion we both possess,
share a common spirituality.
I want to engage in intellectual intercourse.

In L2, I have omitted the word "of" simply because you don't need it. I absolutely love L1. I have read the comments on this thread about the word "drives" and frankly, I can't even understand why there is discussion. The plural, as you have used, is appropriate.

Overall, a very good poem.

Jay


Re: Intellectual Intercourse
Posted by: Lady of the Night (66.231.193.---)
Date: May 05, 2003 04:25PM

Lol! I'd had my reservations about the moon line, but only because it's over-used. The fact that it never actually happens didn't even strike me. Interesting point about meditation... I knew it's usually done in silence, but does it have to be done in silence? I mean, IS meditation a quiet thing? If it is, I'll find another word. I was under the impression that to meditate on something, simply means to focus on it deeply, or to think about it in some kind of in-depth manner. I agree that the cup of wisdom is a tad cliched, but in my opinion, I don't think it's too cliched to be used. "I want to toy with the fingers of the soul that drives you" is one of my favorite lines, too.

I'm glad you liked it, and I'll give your critique some serious thought. Thank you so much for the time you took to critique it.

Lady of the Night


Re: Intellectual Intercourse
Posted by: Brucefur (---.ams.ubc.ca)
Date: May 13, 2003 10:17PM

"The moon was a ghostly Galleon tossed upon cloudy seas..."

Alfred Noyes, The Highwayman. So you do have precedence should you choose to invoke it. Still, to me the Moon, even when quartered looks mor like a SINKING ship than a sailing one. ;o)

Meditation is often done to chants such as those that the monks use to open their minds more fully to the will of God. They are always repetitive in order to lull the mind into a state of self hypnosis though. In MY experiece, meditation almost always includes sound (either humming; the cliched Ummmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm), or the chanting.
I do think that even so, Jay IS right here, because chanting to each other doesn't really fit your poem.

Will concede on the drives line big sigh

Thanks Jay; interesting second perspective.


Re: Intellectual Intercourse
Posted by: Lady of the Night (---.unet.maine.edu)
Date: May 20, 2003 12:33PM

Lol, Bruce. mwah Love you.

The moon sails by... well, when the clouds are moving because of the wind, the moon can look like sailing.. can it, Jay?

Lady of the Night


Re: Intellectual Intercourse
Posted by: Lady of the Night (---.dialsprint.net)
Date: January 27, 2004 09:27AM

Bump, for JHS

Lady of the Night

I never conquered, rarely came, sixteen just held such better days.


Re: Intellectual Intercourse
Posted by: Lady of the Night (---.tys.bellsouth.net)
Date: May 02, 2004 11:45AM

Personal Bump for a friend of mine so he can read it.

Lady of the Night

I never conquered, rarely came, sixteen just held such better days.


Re: Intellectual Intercourse
Posted by: K.Q. (212.118.14.---)
Date: May 03, 2004 07:12AM

Beautiful. I can see why this was your favourite for a long time. I like it a lot!!! Thanks for the read!


Re: Intellectual Intercourse
Posted by: Lady of the Night (---.tys.bellsouth.net)
Date: May 06, 2004 09:37AM

K.Q.,

Thank you! smiling smiley I'm glad you liked it so much. This is pretty old, and one of Bruce's favorites as well. Thanks for reading.

Lady of the Night

I never conquered, rarely came, sixteen just held such better days.


Re: Intellectual Intercourse
Posted by: K.Q. (212.118.14.---)
Date: May 07, 2004 09:16AM

a bump for those who didn't enjoy reading this yet!


Re: Intellectual Intercourse
Posted by: Lady of the Night (---.tys.bellsouth.net)
Date: May 07, 2004 10:44AM

I'm flattered! smiling smiley

Lady of the Night

I never conquered, rarely came, sixteen just held such better days.


Re: Intellectual Intercourse
Posted by: K.Q. (194.165.154.---)
Date: October 12, 2004 08:36PM

Oh, I did bump this before! Well, it just deserves it.


Re: Intellectual Intercourse
Posted by: peternsz (---.client.comcast.net)
Date: October 12, 2004 08:46PM

I like the way the punctuation directs my reading, helps me find where to breath in, where to pause, when to go on. I find that the poem gains clarity from Bruce's suggestion.

Peter




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