Study in grey

Then, only in the evening you feel
how heavily it weighs:
enduring days, nights
on shoulders which cannot endure any more

waiting for weeks, years
for - something...
hoping...
as if that was enough!

Only withstanding
the bleak life
somehow
it's just the way it is

accepting
remaining silent
days, nights

seeing the one in the looking glass whom you don't like
haven't you, before
been
different...




18th of april 2002


Naturally, every poem loses something through translation. I miss the possibility to write some words in capitals, for example. For everybody who cares, the original version:


Studie in grau


Nur abends spürt man dann,
wie schwer es wiegt:
Tage, Nächte zu tragen
auf Schultern, die nichts mehr tragen können

Wochen, Jahre zu warten
auf - etwas...
zu hoffen...
als wenn das genügte!

Das trübe Leben
nur durchzustehen
irgendwie
es ist halt so, wie's ist

anzunehmen
zu schweigen
Tage, Nächte

Im Spiegel die zu sehn, die man nicht mag
man war doch früher
anders...


Comments welcome and greetings to JP. Promise kept! And there's more...
silent siren

I have to leave soon, and will read the others later. There is so much sadness here, my heart breaks. Tell me truly, that this is just a fleeting moment.

Silent Siren -

Good gracious. You've struck a familiar chord with me...I spent the first 13 years of my life being ridiculed for being different. I still am But..I've learned the TRUTH of "If you want others to like you, you have to like yourself first." Sadly, life is a cache-22, and there is much more than that.

I've lots more to say, I'll post again later today. Bell rang.

BRAVO.

Lady of the Night

That is brilliant! Good stuff.

I loved it. It is so rich and poignant, truly pulling at the heart strings.

Dein Gedicht ist hinreisend, besonders auf Deutsch...so dunkel - grau eben - so einsam...Ich mag, wie es endet, ohne zu enden...

Emily, changer of stars

Je parle un peut francais!!! Pas German!!! Translation, s'il vous plait!

(I speak a little french!!! Not German!!! Translation, please!)

- Lady of the Night

Aww! Comfort! I just felt like what I wrote above today - hasn't occurred for one month - and join in and there's you all...thank you.
Milady,
French translation on sunday (monday for you??) since I've got to pay every second!
M,
charming to hear that somebody's able to cope with the origin. 'Ankeschön.
Brucefur, Lychgate,
thank you!! My boyfriend's in Canada for three months, Dawson City, to search for gold, the - - - , and I felt soooo lonely...
JP - I look forward to next comments and then do the lot in one.

Love,
silent siren

(Milady, Bruce, thanks still for "Ma fille" Re:'s! Made my day!)

Sadly-this reflects the hearts of too many. And the words I read expressed
the weariness of it all...made me feel the pain. sigh.

Aw Dawson City,
I live 1,000 km south of there.
Dawson city isn't too bad in summer, but even I wouldn't want to live there in the winter. Why was it that you didn't come to Canada with him Siren?

Also why did he come to Canada in search of gold, when you are obviously priceless!

I am so glad that you liked Ma Fille, and the tongue in cheek commentary that has followed.

On a final note, Study in Grey is one of the best poems that I have read on emule in a long time. You have very strong talent, I hope that you continue to use it.

Brucefur,
my dear friend has returned home unexpectedly sooner, so that settles the matter. Tks 4 compliments
More poetry soon, I only have to let it checked by my friend so I don't involve too much mistakes...
Thanks a lot!
siren

Lady of the night, I'll try what I promised:

Étude en gris

seul le soir on sent enfin
comme grave ca pèse
porter des nuits, des jours
aux épaules qui ne peuvent porter plus

attender des sémaines, des années
pour - quelque chose...
espérer...
comme si c'était suffisant!

- - -

erm...cher Brucefur, est-ce que c'est possible que tu ferais le reste à ma place? Merci beaucoup, parce-que je ne parle pas le francais trop bien, ni mon dictionnaire. Salut!
silent sirène

um...confession time...eeps

Silent Siren,
I am afraid that I am unable to comply, for my own French borders on the non existant. I only speak about 20-30 words of French, which is why I wanted and needed so much help with Ma Fille.
I consider myself lucky that I can mostly manage to read French, but often even there I need help.
It is a pretty sad state of affairs for a Canadian who is offered a free French education.

I was one of those silly ignorant Western Canadians in my youth, with a chip on my shoulder against the greedy Quebecois. Of course at the time I had never been there!

Now I am one of the greatest proponents of Quebec, and my French speaking country men and women. I only wish that I had become wiser sooner.

Most likely I am boring you here, because without being Canadian, this is probably all just nonsense to you.

Lady's French is better than mine, perhaps she can help?

How is it that I missed all of these replies?? Well, I'm going to add my smart-ass remarks a little late!

Brucefur -

You wouldn't want to live anywhere except Prince George and/or Vancouver. Maybe Quebec. Because you're BIASED! Would you leave Canada to come see me? Noooo...but you want me to MOVE out there! And I'll TELL you why Siren didn't go with her boyfriend--cause it's Canada! And Canada is COLD and full of Brucefur's and Chris's and Cody's!! I'm telling you! Oh, and J-J's! It's awful!! J/k You know I love you Oh, but Brucie darling, you break my heart...Siren's priceless too? You smooth-talk with the best of 'em! (Seiken)

Siren -

Don't ever go to Canada. It's bad. They're all plagued by the disease of hubris, and they're all extremely hard-headed. And it's cold and barren. A reliable source (coughbrucefurcough) has even told me that you have "arrived" when you get a McDonald's. NOBODY lives in Canada. And there are REASONS for that!! Lol. And don't ever listen to Brucefur because he's an old man who is far too set in his ways to even begin to view someone else's point, much less believe in the possibility that they may be right!! At least, not before you argue about it for 3 days.

There! I've said my piece

Oh wait....Mon francais n'est pas trops bien...j'etudie la langue pour deux ans, mais je ne parle pas bien! Siren, merci beaucoup pour le translation de votre poem--Même si je ne puis pas le lire!

Au revoir et ciao!

- Lady of the Night

Hey, I have to add my two cents worth to this. I lived in Prince Rupert for a while, and loved it, except for the rain. The scenery was beyond belief, the people warm and friendly, and fresh fish, the like of which you'd never find here. And it's colder here than B.C., though I must admit it's because of all those Arctic clippers you send us. So lay off the poor man, would ya Lady.

Whew JP,
Lived in Prince Rupert, thats a step up from Terrace for sure. I also spent 2 years in New Aiyansh as well. The only problem with Prince Rupert is the 400 different kinds of slush and rain with no real snow.

The fish there is amazing; no one can make fish like the natives do.

Thanks for the support there JP, and for giving Ma Fille a good spanking. lol

Ze Count

JP, Bruce,
gimme both a poem about that city and the time you live(d) there. I'll wonder what springs out. If you do not convince me, I'll stay in Europe
siren

I refuse to stand "duly chastised." I can't defend myself very well here, but I can most certainly stick my nose in the air pridefully and give you both (Brucefur and JP) a good "HMPH!" So there!!

I STILL say that Canada is cold and wet and rainy and poopy and...cold. And barren. And cold. And lonely. And filled with people like "Ze Count" lol. J/k. Bruce is a wonderful man and a beautiful "second father," if a LITTLE worrisome (ya gonna give us both ulcers if ya don't slow down, babe). But that doesn't mean Canada's nearly as wonderful. 'Tis cold.

Have I been there? Nope!

And as for you, Brucefur...sniff you're not sposed to support him in spankin' me...you're too prudish!

- Lady of the Night

Mooh. Don't be worried. I'm still there.
siren

Not done

Who would want to live somewhere with too much rain and 400 different kinds of slush?? Messyyyyyyyyy....yes, my front yard gets covered in 6 inches of mud every spring, but it goes away! Slush is COLD and WET and RAINY. The epitome of Canada.

Siren -

Don't hold your breath

- Lady of the Night

Siren, I lived in Wiesbaden too, is that close to you? Ich spreche nur ein wenig Deutsch, aber Der Rhein und die wein war wunderschon. Sorry, don't have those little umlaut things, my bad german too.

Hmm Siren,

You will have to wait some for that poem you have requested, I just have too much work happening right at the moment...may have bit off more than I can chew in fact...STRESS! ARGH!

My little Nutmeg,

Canada is not all cold, and certainly not barren, containing 10% of all of the worlds forests, but I do have to agree with you on the slush...not a fan of it myself, but fortunately it is only along the coastal regions of British Columbia and does not extend into the interiour.

Lastly I at least have been to Maine; and I would so go and visit you there, just so long as I didn't have to spend more than a week at the mercy of the Pax Americana.

JP,

My family originally hailed from Eisenberg, in the Rhineland Palatinate, emigrating to Canada in 1745 to Luneburg Nova Scotia, which is a quaint little fishing town with a definate German stamp to it.

Siren,

I promise to give that poem a try!

Siren -

If you wait long enough, Brucie here'll write one for ya

Brucefur -

Tsk tsk, watch how much you bite off next time! And as far as Canada goes, it's not a GOOD thing that it contains 10% of all the world's trees!! That's a LOT of trees, and just goes to back up my statement that NOBODY LIVES IN CANADA. So, dear Brucefur, tell me why the population is so low?

- Lady of the Night

PS If you show up on my doorstep I'm going to scream and slam the door!

Silent Siren, I liked it and found it to be deeply introspective. jhs

Hey, cute! Eisenberg is probably two times the distance from N.Y.C. to Philadelphia, I think, northways (Schwerin, Mecklenburg-Vorpommern).
Interesting that you, Bruce, can date back your family relatives...I only know that part of mine came from Poland, then still Germany, and can't follow its line for more than four Generations. All peasants, somehow...
My guy, Milady, also said that he disliked Canada. Poor sod.
siren

Ok i am not reading all these replys lol but i will say i didnt understand the poem that much at first then read a few comments and well got to understanding it a bit better however understanding or not the poem was written well thats a plus and now i half ass no the meaning it was a great poem

"To write something, you have to risk making a fool of yourself." Anne Rice

Siren,

He really should have gone to a part of Canada that didn't have 23 hours of sunlight in the summer with its predictable clouds of bugs, and 23 hours of darkness in winter then. (I just know that lady is going to have something to say about this!).

It turns out that I do already have a poem about when I was there, but unfortunately it is in Prince George and not where I am right now (Vancouver). All I can remember about it is the title which is "For the Record," which isn't much help really ;-)

As well the two places that JP and I have mentioned are less than 200 kilometres apart, which may seem fairly far to you, but in Canada is like walking to the corner grocery store ;-) It is the second largest country in the world, second only to Russia at almost 5 million square kilometres!

Now then Lady, the real reason why the population is so small is because...oh, wait you ARE an American...because it is cold, yes very, very cold and we all live in igloos and ride polar bears to work. Not the sort of place ANY American would want to come to, and certainly not LIVE here, lol :-P

PS: Siren I will try and come up with another poem, that will do my country justice, but sheesh, the pressure! I mean if I don't do a good enough job you will not come?

PPS: JP where do you live?

Illinois, about 90 miles NW of Chicago, near Rockford, but I was born in England, lived in Germany and Canada before coming here. I guess you didn't read any of my earlier poems,or you'd have seen my heart belongs to the moors with their expanses of purple heather and Heathcliffe. When I lived in Prince Rupert, I updated maps, drew in new roads, and other things I don't remember now, so am familiar with all the places you mentioned. But that was a lifetime ago.

Right.
siren

23 hours of sunlight?? 23 hours of darkness?? How messed up is that! That's...that's foolishness! It's preposterous! It's utterly absurd!! I didn't know it was THAT bad!! Geez...! See, you can slam my country all you want cuz IIII don't care But I mean, come on! 400 kinds of slush, freaky daylight/nighttime hours, COLD, barren, empty, containing 10% of the world's trees...you're not earning any brownie points here. Now, seriously Bruce, if Canada is such a wonderful place, why doesn't anyone live there? Oh, oh I know now! We like CIVILIZATION!

Siren, lol, like I said: Don't hold your breath

- Lady of the Night

Silent Siren---this poem reflects a moment in my life about 26 years ago---I looked in the mirror and had the strangest sensation of not knowing who was looking back---a bad time in my life---but it changed my life as I had to make some important changes and decisions --- was a turning point

absolutely loved this poem SMACK...

Thank you Igreen...poetry has to bethe axe for the frozen hearts of ours, freely after Franz Kafka.
siren

Hey there everyone!

I am hereby officially resurecting Siren's best piece of work for your perusal!

Please re-read it and enjoy it as much as I always do.

Brucefur

PS: JP, the challenge is posted by Siren in her June 11th response.

Brucefur, Thanks for bringing up Siren's "best" I enjoyed it the first time---still do....lgreen

Thanks Bruce, I'm lagging, after Vimy Ridge. JP

??????????????????????????????????
Now that's a surprise...whatcha mean, what did I say, point out, I'm lost...
siren

You said, and I'll quote 'JP, Bruce, gimme both a poem about that city and the time you lived there, I'll wonder what springs out. If you do not convince me I'll stay in Europe'. So now we are awaiting a poem from Bruce. JP

Ah. laughter
siren

bump

Nicely done.

Les

still bumpworthy

I agree Jack.

Les

I should let her know that this is back near the top.

Silent Siren,

als ob das genug war!

most excellent piece, in either tongue.

amo et avanti,

Peter