I read your poems today
and now a silent serenade
begins to play;
almost a symphony
as notes light up to dance
uniquely through each line
and proudly twirl and prance
iambic minuets so fine
the purity of melody
is in poetic prosody
that versifies the soul
and feeds a need down deep
that bubbles up to bleed
artistic beauty from the depths of sleep
syncopated cornice
of cacophonous percussion pounds
the rhythmic repetition found
in beauty's mystical spirit -
creating a painting of life
a multi-syllabic tonality
in auditory purity
is precious pleasure bound
around a total sound
of disambiguated fusion found;
imbued and fused poetic truth of youth
Edited 1 time(s). Last edit at 06/02/2009 08:18PM by easyeverett.
Tom, I really enjoyed this one, succinct and powerful.
Les
Hi Les and thank you for the kind words my friend.
I am pleased you enjoyed this one Les. Your friend, tom
Tom:
A lot to admire here...for example, the musicality in these lines: the purity of melody/is in poetic prosody/that versifies the soul...and in these ...a multi-syllabic tonality/ in auditory purity/is precious pleasure bound.
I'm puzzled though about how a "silent serenade begins to play a symphony." That seems a a physical impossibility, even when considering poetic license. Perhaps "a silent serenade begins to swell into a symphony," or something along those lines, might be more appropriate. Then, again, perhaps not. At any rate, I love this piece.
Joe
Edited 3 time(s). Last edit at 06/02/2009 05:59PM by hpesoj.
You are correct and I think i fixed it Joe. Check it out.
I thank you friend. tom
I think i fixed it
You did.
Yes, Joe, your observation saved this poetic my friend. I like
it now which has moved me much further on this one than I thought
I would get. That is why, even in my more clinical writing, a good
and creative editor is vital if not essential to my work. You have
shown that same quality for poetics Joe and I am tickled to death
you have that gift. tom
Just noting my presence.
Hi Mr. P. Presence noted, recorded, and posterity has been saved.
Excellent bump, Les. I do miss Tom. He was one of the most skillful rhymers to visit this site.
I second those remarks on this remarkable person