Someone was asking for help with 'Old English' the other day. Although it turned out that what was needed was 'King James English,' I did manage to find this site- [www.georgetown.edu] />
My favorite- Rudolph the Red-Nosed Reindeer. (Click the link 'diversions.')
And on a similar topic- I found this on a bulletin board in the English Dept. (They always have great jokes/cartoons, second only to the College of Science. It's not that we don't have door cartoons in Business, but they're mostly Dilbert.) Sorry, I don't know the original author.
Subj: Problems in Dating Beowulf
One of the topics I usually set as a research paper for my OE students
is "Discuss some Problems in Dating Beowulf". Normally I italicize
"Beowulf" but this year I got lazy. One of my students served up the
following as part of her paper:
TOP 10 PROBLEMS OF DATING BEOWULF
10. Hangs out with dragons
9. Chain mail rips up bedsheets
8. Throws his swords around apartment
7. Wakes up in the middle of the night screaming "She's gonna eat me!"
6. Carriea a long knife to compensate for feelings of inadequacy.
5. Only washes twice a year.
4. Experiences mead-induced delusions of grandeur and heroism.
3. Smells like Grendel breath
2. Freezer full of dragon meat.
1. Leaves the toilet seat up.
"May beer-drinking cowboys
remain in the mead-hall, may tortoises and snails
crawl behind you, while before go, arrow swift,
foes hastening to hell. May fate grant you
a life course most joyful, contented and productive. "
Leaves the toilet seat up???
When my male kinder was about twelve he suggested to his mom that for the next ten years, she put it up when she was finished. Seemed fair to me.
Then there's 'The Death of Bowie Gizzardsbane,' from one of my favorite books, SILVERLOCK. (author John Myers Myers).
It starts as follows:
The Ballad of Bowie Gizzardsbane
Harsh that hearing for Houston the Raven:
Foes had enfeebled the fortress at Bexar,
Leaving it lacking and looted the while
Hordes were sweeping swift on the land,
Hell-bent to crush him. The cunning old prince
Did not, though, despair at danger's onrushing;
Hardy with peril, he held it, perused it,
Reading each rune of it. Reaching the facts,
He thumbed through his thanes and thought of the one
Whose guts and gray matter were grafted most neatly.
"Riders!" he rasped, "to race after Bowie!"
"Bowie," he barked when that bearcat of heroes
Bowed to his loved prince, "Bexar must be ours
Or no one must have it. So hightail, burn leather!
Hold me that fortress or fire it and raze it.
Do what you can or else do what you must."
For the rest: [www.speakeasy.org] />
I read 'Silverlock' 30 years or so ago. All I remember about it was that it touched on several mythological themes, and it was great.
I haven't thought of that book in a loooong time. Hafta swing by the library and pick it up. Thanks for 'bumping' that one!
Try some of his others as well. (if you can find them) My favorite- The Wild Yazoo, about the settlement of Missisippi.