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Re: i'm looking for a word
Posted by: lg (Moderator)
Date: October 17, 2005 05:42PM

Marian, I'll have you know Groucho was around longer than he was flat.


Les


Re: i'm looking for a word
Posted by: IanB (192.168.128.---)
Date: October 17, 2005 07:48PM

Nostalgia isn't what it used to be.

And to add to the spoonerisms earlier in this thread;

The wedding celebrant who in the ceremony asked whether there was any legal impediment to the young couple before him being 'joyfully loined together'.

Edited 1 time(s). Last edit at 10/18/2005 06:47PM by IanB.


Re: i'm looking for a word
Posted by: Jean-Paul (192.168.128.---)
Date: October 18, 2005 08:46AM

I am, by far, the most modest guy in the world.


Re: i'm looking for a word
Posted by: JohnnySansCulo (192.168.128.---)
Date: October 18, 2005 10:41AM

and how bout those oxymorons like Hyundai Excel, and Hot UK women ?


Re: i'm looking for a word
Posted by: lg (Moderator)
Date: October 18, 2005 04:21PM

I've pen bondering spoonerisms lately. I thunder what causes wem?

My chilled grease sandwich was getting cold, so I went to mall wart where there was a Jack in the Donalds and fopped for some shood. I must have drain bamage, cause everything I saw was bass ackwards. There were chork pops in the meat section and shilk makes at the fountain. I finally settled for a bamhurger with furly cries. By the lime I teft, I was tearly in nears.

Next time, I think I'll go down to the Query Dean, where I know I can get a share fake.


Les


Edited 1 time(s). Last edit at 10/18/2005 04:29PM by lg.


Re: i'm looking for a word
Posted by: vic jefferies (192.168.128.---)
Date: October 19, 2005 04:16AM

Don't know the word for a person who consantly uses words incorrectly but do know the word for those who persist in wrongly spelling words such as:

jail for gaol;
theater for theatre;
center for centre..........


Re: i'm looking for a word
Posted by: vic Jefferies (192.168.128.---)
Date: October 19, 2005 04:16AM

oooooooooops!


Re: i'm looking for a word
Posted by: PamAdams (192.168.128.---)
Date: October 19, 2005 03:40PM

I think that the word you're looking for is 'American.'

pam


Re: i'm looking for a word
Posted by: drpeternsz (192.168.128.---)
Date: October 19, 2005 06:16PM

a propagandist


Re: i'm looking for a word
Posted by: drpeternsz (192.168.128.---)
Date: October 19, 2005 06:20PM

One would hope that one's contemporaries might not be so parochial as to think "to be different" is synonymous with "to be incorrect," expecially in matters linguistic.


Re: i'm looking for a word
Posted by: lg (Moderator)
Date: October 19, 2005 08:39PM

As the Rev. Spooner said, "There is no peace in a home where a dinner swells."


Les


Re: i'm looking for a word
Posted by: vic jefferies (192.168.128.---)
Date: October 19, 2005 09:23PM

PamAdams

Is this something else that we can blame the Americans for?


Re: i'm looking for a word
Posted by: lg (Moderator)
Date: October 20, 2005 02:52PM

Vic, don't be ungrateful, after all we've given you Microsoft and hip hop. While all you gave us is Olivia Newton-John and Greg Norman.

Come to think of it I'll trade you two Yahoos for another Greg Norman.


Les


Re: i'm looking for a word
Posted by: Desi (Moderator)
Date: October 20, 2005 03:05PM

I think as a thank you for Microsoft we should put you in quarantine!


Re: i'm looking for a word
Posted by: JohnnySansCulo (192.168.128.---)
Date: October 20, 2005 03:35PM

American Cheese


Re: i'm looking for a word
Posted by: lg (Moderator)
Date: October 20, 2005 03:41PM

Cheesy American!

Les


Re: i'm looking for a word
Posted by: JohnnySansCulo (192.168.128.---)
Date: October 20, 2005 03:43PM

I'm more corny than cheesy


Re: i'm looking for a word
Posted by: lg (Moderator)
Date: October 20, 2005 03:45PM

Desi, so it was you who threw the pie!

[66.102.7.104] />
Les

(NOT a TRUE STORY)

Bill Gates in hell


Steve Jobs died and was sent to Hell. He was set to work handling tech support for the computer network. After several millenia he got to go on break. He was walking up the hallway to the break room, and noticed a door ajar.

Peering inside he noticed Bill Gates sitting in a hot tub with a gorgeous woman.

Perplexed, and quite angry, Jobs continued walking to the break room, and noticed the Ombundsman's Office. He went inside and there was Satan himself sitting at the customer service desk.

Jobs explained his complaint that it didn't seem fair that he was having to do penance doing tech support while his former rival was enjoying himself with a lovely woman.

Satan fixed Jobs with a cold stare and roared "HOW DARE YOU COMMENT ON THAT WOMAN'S PUNISHMENT."

Edited 2 time(s). Last edit at 10/20/2005 03:53PM by lg.


Re: i'm looking for a word
Posted by: lg (Moderator)
Date: October 20, 2005 04:13PM

I'm more corny than cheesy

Ahhhh, so you're a hot dog, or . . .dot hog, if you prefer!



For dinner last week, I was served keys and parrots which I drenched with a Margarita and liced slime.

I was too squeamish to try the rot post, so I settled for the bound grief.


Les








Re: i'm looking for a word
Posted by: JohnnySansCulo (192.168.128.---)
Date: October 20, 2005 04:52PM

mew


Attachments: bigmamathorntonhounddog1ut.jpg (9.2KB)  
Re: i'm looking for a word
Posted by: JustJack (192.168.128.---)
Date: October 20, 2005 04:56PM

These are all from this week.

His daughter is doing well in school. How well? "She's carrying a 3.9 GPS!"

He recently tried a new scheme at work, but it turned out to be "A flash in the pants."

That's what he gets for doing things "On the sperm of the moment."

I was taking some pies to a pot-luck at the Red Cross chapter where I volunteer.
He is under the impression that I only work there because there are lots of women to... I don't know. Whatever his mind comes up with. Anyway, when he saw the pies he said, "You know what they say. The way to a woman's stomach is through her... uh... well... they like pie!"

These and many, many more.
Every day.
It wouldn't be funny if he did it on purpose.


Jack


Re: i'm looking for a word
Posted by: lg (Moderator)
Date: October 20, 2005 07:21PM

Yeah, around here, making comments like: "On the sperm of the moment."

is inconceivable. Though the idea is pregnant with possibilities.



Les


Re: i'm looking for a word
Posted by: JustJack (192.168.128.---)
Date: October 20, 2005 08:45PM

These are all fresh this week:


His daughter is doing well at school. How well?
"She's carrying a 3.9 GPS."

He proposed a good idea at work. It looked good at first, but...
"It was just a flash in the pants."

He usually thinks these things through. He doesn't like to act...
"On the sperm of the moment."

The best one this week came when I told him about the Red Cross pot-luck.
He thinks I only volunteer there to meet women (He's wrong). When I showed him the pies I was taking, he looked at them knowingly and said...
"You know what they say. The way to a woman's stomach is through her... uh... well... uh... They like pie."


These are ALL real. And many, many more.
They wouldn't be funny if he did it on purpose.



Jack


Re: i'm looking for a word
Posted by: lg (Moderator)
Date: October 20, 2005 09:17PM

Wait a minute, didn't I just hear that?

Or, are there two Jacks with quirky friends?


Les



Re: i'm looking for a word
Posted by: drpeternsz (192.168.128.---)
Date: October 21, 2005 02:42AM

I thought I was having hot flashes back, Jack.


Re: i'm looking for a word
Posted by: drpeternsz (192.168.128.---)
Date: October 21, 2005 02:43AM

The word you are looking for is POLITICIAN.


Re: i'm looking for a word
Posted by: rikki (192.168.128.---)
Date: October 21, 2005 05:02AM

lg Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------


While all you gave us
is Olivia Newton-John and Greg Norman.



Les, how about penicillin, microsurgery, the bionic ear, wind-surfing, The Wiggles and ... um ... that strange man who wrestles crocodiles....??


rikki

(ps. sorry about Olivia)


Re: i'm looking for a word
Posted by: vic jefferies (192.168.128.---)
Date: October 23, 2005 04:12AM

Rikki,

Are you referring the very small Australian man who wrestles crocodiles or the other small Australian man who used to wrestle crocodiles and wore crocodile teeth in the band of his hat. The one who showed the world what a knife really looked like, "That's not a knife. This is a knife!"


Re: i'm looking for a word
Posted by: rikki (192.168.128.---)
Date: October 23, 2005 09:07PM


Vic, I'd forgotten about the first croc-wrestler! I was thinking of Steve what's-his-name when i wrote that. How could I forget Dundee?



"New York City, Mr. Dundee. Home to seven million people."
"That's incredible. Imagine seven million people all wanting to live together. Wow, New York must be the friendliest place on earth."


smiling smiley


Re: i'm looking for a word
Posted by: lg (Moderator)
Date: October 23, 2005 10:48PM

Where would the world be without wind-surfing?

That's the Aussie equivalent of our ice surfing. [wintermt.com] />

Les


Re: i'm looking for a word
Posted by: vic jefferies (192.168.128.---)
Date: October 24, 2005 07:42AM

Aussies go ice surfing when they are too old to wind surf.


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